Sure your life is great and other people probably think it’s pretty close to being perfect. But in your heart you get this nagging feeling that something isn’t quite there yet.
So what’s missing? A new job, a new relationship or a change in geography? Or maybe it’s the desire to see the world through a different lens… a larger, broader perspective perhaps?
The good news is if you feel this way, it’s a sign that you are growing. Even though it’s kind of awkward and uncomfortable it’s your soul telling you that you are ready for the next stage.
But how do you make changes when you don’t know what isn’t working? The only way to discover clarity around this is to invest time into it. I know that sounds obvious but it’s often easier said then done because we are all too quick to give the entire world our attention and leave very little for ourselves.
We need to switch that up and start spending time asking ourselves questions that will lead to clarity.
It’s a process that does not offer instant gratification – it doesn’t happen overnight. So begin where you are and work with what you know (which is a lot more than you give yourself credit for). If you feel this way I suggest writing out two separate lists. One for:
The things that aren’t really working
And the other for:
Things that are working right now
For the Things that aren’t really working list write out all the things you know with absolute certainty that are not bringing you satisfaction anymore. Maybe your social life is unsatisfying but previously you were quite content with it. Maybe you are feeling isolated in your community. Whatever it is, write out all the different things that you know are just not ‘feeling right’ any more.
For the second Things that are working now list write out all the things that are going amazing or that are making you feel very satisfied. Maybe you continue to take great care of your health and you love that. Maybe your friendships are exactly how you would want them to be. So for this part you are writing down everything that does ‘feel right’ now.
The next thing to do is to look at both lists and review your points. How does it feel to review your two lists? Is it interesting or surprising?
Now, pick two action steps that you can take right now to either improve or deepen your satisfaction in each list. For example, while looking at the first list of Things that aren’t working let’s say I realize that I am not feeling like I am as connected to my community as I would like. An action step I could take would be to look around for fun programs or volunteer efforts in my community that would interest me.
Next, review the second Things that are working list and see what action steps you can take to deepen your level of satisfaction. For example, let’s just say that I wrote that my friendships are great, then an action step would be to tell my closest friends just how much they mean to me.
As you can tell, with this exercise you are deepening your satisfaction with things that are going well and improving the things that could be better.
If you get the sense that you are meant for something more then the first thing you need to do is look at your life right now. Don’t worry, you might not hit the nail on the head right away but you are on the journey towards discovering what is missing.
I suggest putting in at least 45 minutes for this exercise so that you can make sure you touch on everything that is working well and isn’t working as well as you want.
I am here to validate that you are not going crazy. It’s okay to have a great life but to feel that there’s something more that’s waiting for you. It just means you are evolving and that is wonderful!
So am I the only one out there or do you also ever get the feeling that you are meant for something more?